The future of online dating
Seeing as dating apps will be around indefinitely, it leaves me as a matchmaker unsure of what the love lives of tomorrow will look like. One: there really is no substitute for the feeling of a genuine human connection.
Two: the fact that you have found and read this article shows that there is hope still for long-term romance – you may just need to look a little beyond your phone screen. Matchmaking and online dating represent the bookends of the spectrum of outsourcing one’s romantic wellbeing to a third party.
So, even if they think about some of these future possibilities a day into knowing you, they know they need to give the relationship time to develop. A future faker uses promises, inferences and intensity to simulate intimacy.
On the receiving end, you’re subconsciously (and sometimes consciously) associating what they’re doing with someone you know far better than you do.
It felt, as all-too-often these situations do, as if we’d known each other much longer, thanks to us hitting some key milestones.
While most of us have, at one time or another, overestimated our interest or capacity to commit, people who habitually (even if they’re in denial about it) hype up the future to get what they want in the present, are future fakers.Future faking isn’t just about someone creating the ideal conditions to make it easier to get what they want; they also like how they look in this fantasy relationship and feeling as if they’re giving you an amazing time.When the future doesn’t materalise and the fairy tale rug is ripped from under your feet, it’s all too easy to ignore the lack of integrity and blame yourself.Rachel also sits on the Board of Advisors for the Matchmaking Institute.In the late 90s, I spent a whirlwind couple of weeks being courted by an incredibly charming guy.