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I have heard a few stories about doms who felt unable to bring BDSM into initially-vanilla relationships, or were less dominant as they became more attached to a kinky partner.And couples who enjoy occasional power play but who are not exclusively into often remark that it enhances their non-BDSM vanilla” sex because the practice they get negotiating scenes makes it easier to discuss other aspects of their sexuality The skills required for include trust, clear communication, self-acceptance, and acceptance of the other person.I actually read it last year while in a long term relationship with a vanilla girl, and after reading it several times, getting therapy together etc, I finally brought myself around to realizing that I need a truly kinky partner in my life.Some wrote that they’d never known sexuality without BDSM; others were introduced to kink by a partner later on.And some, like Sysiphe, who now identifies as a dominant masochist, encountered the scene through parties and other kink community gatherings.

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