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In Tunisia gay life has many faces: from secretive post-marital same-sex-not-gay quickies among straight husbands, to ongoing pre-marital youth same-sex-not-gay with friends, to totally gay friendship networks among different age peers, to monogamous boyfriend couples to discrete liaisons from the internet.It is not easy to label the ‘scene’ here because it is not organized, not open, not admitted, yet it’s cruisy, sexy, internet-connected and quite populous. During my visit I chatted with two very different gay men, one a young student at a local university and the other a retired Italian resident of Tunis now self-employed. Ari, a university student studying architecture, and I met at tea time and had creamy thick hot chocolate at a trendy modern coffee shop and later went for pizza across the street.I’m not allowed to talk about guys but I can have all the sex I want before marriage.How funny life is so twisted.” Indeed, it’s a well-known secret within Muslim societies that young straight men are not virgins by the time they get married, having practiced on each other as teenagers.“Make sex, not politics,” he was alleged to have commented before his downfall.

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Such impulses lead him to slippery feelings for other men, with shallow judgments and intense desires.(French, along with Arabic, is the major language here; sophisticated Tunisians prefer to speak French.) Ari talks about himself expressively and pensively; restless and eager to tell his story of life from an early age (before 10) when he had his first carnal experience at the hands of a cousin, which Ari at first resisted then quickly liked after a few times. If I wasn’t gay I think I would not have felt the pleasure of it.” This went on until he was ten or eleven. I didn’t stay with him.” The doctor then thought Ari was depressed and gave him Prozac but it made him feel sleepy and buzzed. By the time he was twelve, in 2004, he was fully aware of what homosexuality is.When he finally told his mother she sent him to a psychiatrist who said he could cure him but only if he really wanted to change. The wide world of LGBT life is available to anyone with a computer.All of which fuel an adventurous spirit of discovery and wonder and also ennui with the world around him.Part of his ‘curse’ is being gay and privileged in a ‘third-world’ conservative Muslim country.

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