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If taken seriously, few activities may fill your life with such highs, and such lows, as dating.

Now that it's possible to frenetically juggle prospects on multiple sites and apps and then bounce from bar to bed with them, the roller coaster can get very extreme indeed.

And he was reminiscing about all the big dances and their ebullient energy and joyriding in the 1930s.

Our conversation has been edited for brevity and clarity.

What you point out is how, even from the early days of dating in the early 20th century, we've talked about it as a form of shopping -- and as a game.

I feel like that era was fun — with the serious proviso that if you were queer, not white, not middle class, it was not fun.

This is your first book, and it got a lot of attention (in the New Yorker, the Atlantic, and the New York Times).